Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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