I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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