She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
