Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
