I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
