so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
