I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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