Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
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Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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