I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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