just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
