He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
