My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
