everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I just want nice things and good sex
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
