I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize