Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
