Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
