No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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