I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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