The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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