so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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