oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
