sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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