Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
