fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize