He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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