Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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