You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
