my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
