Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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