i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
