I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
