He kissed a someone with a penis
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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