Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I supernannyed him into submission
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
