Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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