This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
