Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
