I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
