I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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