Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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