and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize