Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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