Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
