it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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