i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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