The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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