I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
everyone is single if you try hard enough
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
