8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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