Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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