I think I am morally bankrupt
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
