It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
