I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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