I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you would pick up someone in the library
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
